2019 was such an exciting time in my life. I was ready to leave high school and start the next chapter of my life, going to college. My freshman year experience at UCSB was dramatically different than how I envisioned it to be.
Let me take a couple steps back now to explain my life in high school and why my life was so different when I started college. Every Thursday night at 8:30 PM, I hop on a FaceTime call with some friends and look at all the new music dropping on Spotify from artists such as Drake to Alina Baraz to Emotional Oranges… the list goes on. 12:00 AM we hop back on the call and talk about what our favorite songs were from each album. We discuss what each song reminds us of whether it breakups, peanut butter jelly sandwiches, certain events in our life, and again the list goes on. Listening to new music was a way of sharing and hearing experiences that you wouldn’t talk to someone about on a daily basis. It requires one to deeply analyze why a certain lyric or sound causes one to feel a certain way
In addition to listening to music, I would play music at my drumline rehearsals everyday after school. This was the competitive, edgy side that music gave me. The sweat and repetition it takes to play one song perfectly in sync with 12 other people is gruesome but completely worth it. The countless hours of suffering you spend with other people during hot summer days with your instructors shouting at you and menacingly shoving a stick into your forehead for making the same mistake twice inevitably brings you closer to the people in your drumline. Competing against other drumlines is showmanship of superior skill on the lowest level. Once you reach the highest league of competitive music performance, every player is fundamentally sound and has the raw skill to play amazing beats. However because drumline is a group activity, these competitions are rather a display of which group is the most in sync or which group has the most chemistry (which group is most tightly bonded and spends the most time with each other). It’s just competing to demonstrate which group is the “bestest” of friends/
The worst part is that I didn’t realize any of this until I actually started college. During high school, the goal was always to get to college. This attitude is evident in many high schools and especially the ones in the area I grew up which is predominantly Asian. (I don’t want to dig to deep into this, but there is definitely a huge emphasis on pursuing success in STEM based education in Asian cultures in order to be a reputable person). I was never really concerned with what was actually going on around me during high school.
When I finally get to UCSB, there wasn’t really any emphasis on music education or music in culture. As you walk down Del Playa Street on your typical Friday night, you hear the same songs you hear on the radio Sicko Mode and Old Town Road and you may hear an occasional September by Earth, Wind, and Fire. There’s nothing wrong with playing mainstream songs from the radio. They are optimal choices for parties because literally everyone knows them. However, when you hear the same music every Friday night, it just feels like nobody is changing. Nobody is really making new genuine connections. It feels like the dynamic in the area is just static. When you listen to a song that everybody knows, you share that same superficial connection to everyone listening to that song. However, when you share a song that only you know, or song that many people (but still has some special value to you) and you share your story behind that song, you connect on a really deep level with that person. Additionally, unless music was your major at UCSB, there was no opportunity to develop your musical playing skills. USC on the other hand provided me with a chance to bring music back into my life and study biology at the same time. (I picked up music production as my minor and I joined the drumline here).
For the past 15 years, playing music, listening to music, analyzing music, and teaching music were what my life was centered around. Music was a way of life for me; it was how I connected with people. I simply didn’t realize what music meant to me until it was gone. I was so focused on going to college that in the process my tunnel vision prevented me from actually realizing what genuinely connected me with people. I urge you all to omnisciently observe your life and pursue what makes you happy.
